Monday, October 6, 2008

BLACKED OUT!

I look out my window & see you standing there
I think it's a dream, but every time I look you're still there
I run away from my window and feel like you're chasing me
As I run faster & faster I feel you're gaining speed
I can't run any more, out of breathe, I fell to the floor
I wake up in a hospital bed wondering what happened?
everyone looking over my bed, asking me "Am I alright?"
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1 comment:

mike said...

Now it's definitely working. My comments: you need to give me more meat...Try writing a few lengthier poems or some very long, dark reflections on life....Something that will show that you can write a more sustained piece.

October 7, 2008 at 4:00 AM

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