Strengthen

When I think of you tears come to my eyes
knowing I'll never see you again
all of the pain you've been through and no relief insight
how will you ever get through it?
I admire you through your courage and strengthen to make it through
know I'll always be here for you

MSG Retreat Weekend

The MSG weekend was LOADS OF FUN! The weekend was GREAT! We left from school on Friday afternoon and went to Plainsboro, NJ. On Friday night we had a workshop, dinner, and free time. The free time consisted of Kevin playing on the piano and singing Disney songs. (it was a group effort) Saturday was workshops, group work, and free time. During our free time we sang more songs and played a game and split among 2 teams. Sunday we had a workshop and come home. Even though the weekend retreat was short we had a lot of fun! The most important part of it was we "grew" closer as friends and more towards a family. We all listened to each others ideas, joked around, laughed at each, and just had fun! We bonded as a whole and that helps us build a connection.

"You Don't have the Right to Bore Me"

The screaming, yelling, and storming out when I was younger
there were triple the amount of days when you were gone from when you were "HOME"
I don't have any memories of you
you left when we were all at such a young age
its always been the 6 of us
I've always wanted someone in my life to be the "role" you were suppose to be
I finally found that person, but to no surprise it wasn't you!

"Belly of the Beast"

after what happened,
how can I forgive you?
every sight of you makes me PUKE
the memories we had together are ALL WASHED-AWAY
after you lied and "back-stabbed" me how can I ever believe you?
after what you did I NEVER want to see you AGAIN!
you put me through heart-ache and sorrow, that doesn't bother you
when you get hurt don't come crying to me
you say you'll be there, but what a surprise you weren't
good-byes are sometimes meant to be!

government conference

heyyy...I'm on the Molloy government conference right now! it's so much fun...going to maek this blog much "beefer" as Dr. Russo says tomorrow when I get home...gotta go ;)

"Fire Extinguisher"

"Fire Extinguisher"
by: Bianca, Caitlin, Sam, & Jill
2nd Place Winner in the WORST poem contest ever! :)

sometimes I wear a hat
my grandma has a cat
omg! look over there!
I don't know what to wear
Joe Jonas is HOT!
Kevin Jonas is not!
I like to play in the snow
yo momma is a hoe!
I'm tired!
you're fired!
strawberries covered in chocolate are good
don't ever go to the hood
my mom has a car
twinkle twinkle little star
I like the color pink
I like it when boys wink
I got a big butt
my dog's a mutt
outside there's a tree
I like a cup of tea
lets get naked
shake & bake it
the sun is out in the day
horses eat hay
gimme gimme more
campfires & a s'mores
my brothers name is Chris
wanna give me a kiss?
cows go moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!
omg! shoes!
I'm sitting in a chain
Smokey the bear!
TV IS FUN!

'...Memories..."

High school flew by in 4 years
sitting at orientation in the auditorium
sitting at graduation in C.W. Post
meeting new people
leaving people
saying good-bye was never EASY
we've made friends
we've lost friends
the impressions people left
will NEVER fade away
the lessons we learned
the memories we took with us
will never leave us...

"Missing You"

when I look back at pictures
i can't help, but to cry
not seeing you everyday
i think of the times we shared
the jokes that were made
the times we just didn't do anything,
but had so much fun
when we would just talk about nothing
we've had our share of heartache,
but made through it
through thick and thin
we were always there
countless nights on the phone
our walks together
then it seemed so far away
but now it's arrived
missing you is much harder then I'd ever thought

Tara<33

When I look at pictures I think of that day, what happened, where was I, who was I with, etc...I've been talking to one of my BEST FRIENDS from high school and we have a lot of jokes no one understands except us! We met each other from another friend of ours before out freshmen year of high school and we've been friends since. During our freshmen year of high school we didn't have many classes together, but that all changed in sophomore year. Our schedules were basically identical! We would sit next to each other in chemistry and our chem teacher gave us the nickname "BUDDY". She would always refer to one of us as where's you buddy or where's your other half? We were inseparable! During our junior year we didn't have as many classes together, but we did have 1 of our favorite classes Mr. H's Spanish class :) Is class was definitely unique without a doubt, but it was a TON of FUN! During our Junior & Senior year we were involved in Sports Night, and the both of us were NUTS, but if you knew the both of us, you'd agree! :) During our senior year we went to Switzerland & Italy together! A trip of a lifetime! Tara attends Sacred Heart University in Connecticut. We were talking tonight and we kept reminiscing about high school, our classes, our jokes, EVERYTHING! I thought about all the pictures we have together, also, and realize, even though she's away at school and will be home soon you take for granted when people are home! You think even though they'll be home on school breaks and a long weekend, you don't realize how much you'll miss them, until you don't see them everyday! I miss you Tara!<33>

The Beach Trip

as we sit on the beach
our feet are wet from the water
the sand is in between our toes
we start scratching from mosquitoes
the sun is above us
as we sit on the rocks
Dr. Russo' takes pictures
as we sit and listen to the water
calming as the waves crash

"Imagine"

Imagine your possibilities
If you believe anything is possible
Dreams can come true if you put your mind to it
Nothing is impossible

"My Favorite Things"

My favorite Things (not in order):

1. High School Musical Build-a-Bear
I love my High School Musical build-a-bear for many reasons. Over the summer on one of our many trips into the city my Mom took us build-a-bear workshop in NYC, the BIGGEST BUILD-A-BEAR store in the WORLD! As most people who know me know, I'm OBSESSED WITH EVERYTHING HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL! My Mom helped my pick out the HSM clothes to but on my bear, by the way her name is "Spirit", we got the HSM messenger bag and the HSM sound in my bear, it has 4 different sayings/sounds.

2. My Pillows
I pillows are have geese-down feathers in them, therefore making them REALLY SOFT AND COMFY. I've had these pillows for several years. I can fall asleep on my pillows anywhere, not just in my bed.

3. Picture Colleague
Last year in Religion, my teacher Mr. Wresen, told us for a homework assignment make a colleague of pictures about ourself or write a 1 paragraph describing ourselves. For me it was easier to make the colleague, because I'd have to write to much! In my colleague there's pictures of my family in Disney, my Cat, Bob, some of my Sweet 16, some of Junior Prom, the Marist Youth Encounter I went on in my Junior year, Freshmen Camp pictures, when I went back as a Senior Leader, and some scenic pictures. As usual, there were Disney stickers on my colleague.

4. PINK BEAR & PANDA BEAR<333333
I've had Pink Bear and Panda Bear since I was 3. I got them at Macy's in Manhasset. Pink Bear and Panda Bear are 2 of my OLDEST stuff animals and the 2 stuff animals that I will never give up. I remember when i was in Nursery, Pre-K, and Kindergarten I would take them with me to school all the time, especially for nap time. When I was younger I couldn't sleep without them. I will still have them when I have kids!

5. My Bag
I love bags. I'm always looking for new bags. I lost count of how many bags I have, but I love all the different types, styles, colors, sizes, all that stuff.

6. Fluffy Minnie
People who know me, know that I LOVE DISNEY! When I went to Disney 2 summers ago, I bought a pink-baby Minnie and she's really soft and fluffy! She's so comfy you could use her as a pillow. Like a lot of my other stuff animals she sleeps on my bed with me and she reminds me of my trip to Disney with my Mom and 4 brothers.

7. CHICKY!<333
My Mom gave my 2 nicknames when I was a baby. Jilly Bean & Chicky. When I was a baby I had a stuff animal named Chicky. She would sing the Easter Song and she had a little rainbow egg in front of her. When 1 of my twin brothers was a baby, he was sick and throwing up and all of his stuff animals were dirty since he was sick. SO my Mom said, "Jill, let him sleep with Chicky otherwise he won't sleep." I kept persisting no because I knew he was going to throw up again. My Mom kept saying no he wasn't, but of course he did! I had to throw Chicky out :( About 10-12 years ago we were in a store at Easter time and My Mom and I found another "Chicky". That Easter My Mom got me her.

8. Charm Bracelet
For my confirmation, as 1 of my gifts my Mom got me a charm bracelet and at every milestone she gets me a new charm. The charms I have on my bracelet are (not in order): for my 13th birthday, 18th birthday, Sweet 16, Confirmation-Cross, a dancer, a girl, a snowman, a Christmas stocking, "I Love You Nana", a Teddy Bear, 8th grade graduation, High School graduation, every milestone or special occasion my Mom gets me a new charm.

9. My Journal
For my 18th birthday, one of my favorite teachers, Mrs. Kennedy, gave me a journal. Since then I've written poetry in it or if I just need to write and get things out of my mind that's where I can do it.

10. My iPod
Last Christmas my Mom got me the new apple nano video iPod. I really like my iPod because whenever I'm in a bad mood and don't want to talk about it all I have to do is watch a movie on my iPod (yes, there's HSM movies & all the songs on my iPod) or listen to music and I fell much better. Also, since I drive my own car now I plug in my iPod into my car and BLAST IT! :)

11. St. Mary's High School Yearbook-Class of 2008 :)
My yearbook is really important to me because of what certain people wrote in it and just all of the memories I have in it! Every time I look at my yearbook and look at a certain picture I remember everything that happened at that moment and just laugh about it.

12. St. Mary's High School's Graduation Ring
We got our graduation rings in November of our Junior year. When we received our rings I knew even though we had a while or what seemed a while, to go to graduation, it wasn't, but in a blink of an eye I was walking across the stage at C.W. Post at graduation on Saturday June 7th.

13. Nanie & Poppa Picture<333
This picture is very special to me because it was only a 3 years later when my Poppa got sick and then my Nanie. I don't have many pictures with my Nanie and Poppa when I was much older because they were sick.

14. My Communion Ring
When I made Communion in 2nd grade my Nanie got me a ring, with a 2 little flowers and a little heart in the middle. Even though the ring still doesn't fit me today, it's really special because my Nanie got it for me. :)

15. High School Musical 2 DVD
As I stated before, I'm really into High School Musical EVERYTHING! but the DVD in the picture isn't just about HSM it's because along with HSM I'm REALLY INTO MOVIES! I really enjoy watching movies at home, in the theaters, and my 2 favorite things are when my Mom and I have our girls' nights and watch movies or my friends and I all go to someone's house and just watch movies all night. A movie-marathon.

16. Army Wives book
Army Wives is my favorite TV show! My Mom and I watch it together every Sunday night from 10:00-11:00pm. The book represents the show and that I'm reading the book, bur also the fact that i love to read. Sometimes it can be annoying especially if you're not into in for school work, but when I read for my own pleasure I LOVE it!

17. My Camera
I love taking pictures because when the day is done you'll have the pictures to go back and look at it and enjoy. I also love pictures because when years go by and then you find a bunch of old pictures you'll remember everything!

18. Dance Trophy
I've been dancing for 12-13 years. I dance tapp, junior tapp line, jazz, junior jazz line, hip-hop, modern, opening & finale. I love to dance because it expresses another side of yourself. Sometimes the sides many people don't see of you normally.

19. My Stuff Animals
I'm LOVE STUFF ANIMALS. I HAVE SO MANY I CAN'T KEEP THEM ALL ON MY BED OTHERWISE I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO SLEEP ON MY BED :)

20. My Hello Kitty Blanket
My Mom got it for 1 of my presents for my 12th birthday for me. It's so warm and it's fleece, which is really soft!

"My Inspiration"

I've had many different sources of inspiration in my live, such as family, teachers, friends...One of my BIGGEST inspirations ever is MY MOM! My Mom has always been an inspiration to me and will continue to be one for me. She's the BEST person EVER! My Mom has done so much it's mind-blowing! I've always wanted to and will continue to aspire to be just like My Mom. She's raising 5 kids all by her-self, without any help, just for starters! She's ALWAYS been optimistic and NEVER LET anyone or anything stop her. My Mom's a very DETERMINED person and NEVER doubts herself. My Mom is always there for my 4 brothers and myself. She's never missed a dance recital, soccer games, softball games, baseball games, back-to-school nights, bake sales, parties, NOTHING! She's ALWAYS put my brothers and me before herself. I remember in 3rd grade we all dressed up as Saints and went around my elementary school signing "When the Saints Coming Marching In" on Halloween,the day before All Saints Day. I was Mary the Blessed Mother, the weekend before the school event my Mom stayed up all night to make my costume by hand! Sure My Mom could of saved her-self all the time she put into hand-making my costume, but she wanted to make my costume, for me! My Mom's my BIGGEST INSPIRATION because of who She is, the lessons She's taught me, and what she believes. MOST IMPORTANTLY FOR MY MOM BEING WHO SHE IS! I LOVE MY MOM! xoxo :)

The Pivot Questionnaire

What is your favorite word?

Believe. Believe is my favorite word because you can do whatever you want and dream as long as you believe!

What is your least favorite word?

Stupid. I don't have a top # 1 least favorite word, but "stupid" is right up there.

What turns you on, excites, or inspires you creatively, spiritually, or emotionally?

When I'm out hanging out with my friends and beign around people inspires my creativity because when I'm with my friends I just act my-self. I don't but a "mask" on for anyone. Aslo, when I'm with people I don't know I don't act any differently, then my-self because if people don't like you for who you are, then it's not worth having them in your life.

What turns you off?

I'm turned off by hypocrites. I can't stand people who act like your friend in person then talk about you behind you're back.

What sound or noise do you love?

The sound I love is the ocean.

What sound or noise do you hate?

The noise I hate is yelling.

What is your favorite curse word?

A**h***. It's pointless.

What profession other than you own would you like to attempt?

A teacher. My major is education in special ed w/english. I teach CCD and I really enjoy it! I LOVE workign with kdis. I baby-sit for several of my neighbors over the past 5 1/2 years and the kids are sooooo funny, you learn a lot from them.

What profession would you like to absolutely not participate in?

Chemistry! Even though I've thought about being a pediatric nurse, I HATE chemistry!

If heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Well I believe heaven exits, I'm not exactly sure what I would want him to say, but maybe this, "everything happens for a reason."

Busy Day

This morning I picked up Faith for school. I got to school around 8:00. I hung up posters for the Band-aid drop. (the band-aid drop is from now until November 7) I had work 9:00-12:00 and I was able to get the computer working without my manager after he tried it. :) I was very happy with my-self :) lol I then had class on the beach, SOOOOOO MUCH FUN!!!!!! I got my nails done. I went hoem for a little while, then went to the back-to-school night at my high school I graduated from for my brothers. I saw 1 of MY FAVORITE TEACHERS EVER! He's much more then that, though. I had to go through my 3 brothers schedules spilit amongst, my Mom, oldest brother, Tommy, and me. Since I got home I've been texting Bruce :) and adding pictures to my blog and watching the news. Now I'm going to go get ready to go to sleep because tomorrow I'm going to pick-up Faith, work, classes, newspaper meeting, and idk what esle... :)

WEST END 2 BEACH FIELD TRIP

Today, for class we went to West End 2 Beach, for a field trip. The trip was A LOT of fun when you take out the "bug running". lol We took SOOOOO MANY PICTURES of so many different things on different angles. I went in the water, and in the beginning it was cold, but once I was in there for a minute or two, it got much better. Sam and Bianca were making me laugh (as you can see in a picture), and I almost fell fave first into the water. We foudn a really big dead helly fish, too. There were a good amount of them actually in the water, today, also. We had to write nature haiku's while we were at the beach. Travis, of course, thought they were "too easy", but then if there so esay, why didn't you write one Travis? :) lol While walking to the water and from the water we encoutenered a swarm of mostiquitos. NOT FUN! When you sit just sit on the beach opposed, toy trying to get a tan or go in the water, you see things differently, more relaxing. :)

J-I-L-L-I-A-N

OOOO Travis, here coems another acrostic peom...hehe :) lol

Jumping for joy

Insightful

LOUD wherever I am

Laughter, I LOVE to laugh

Inspirational

Always willing ot help someone

Never give up an opportunity

Drawing a Blank

I had such a GREAT idea to write in for a blog entry, but of course I forgot it when I came to my computer and decided to type it....grrr...when I think of it I'll type it up...

Trust

How can we know to trust people?
Just when you think you can trust a person they go behind your back!
Trust MUST be in a relantioship, otherwise it isn't worth having one.
How do you know when you can trust someone and when you can't?

"Close Connections"

So far, during my life I've encountered numberous people who come into my life and stay for awhile and then leave, even people who are always suppose to be there. One person who has alwyas been there for me since I was born is my MOM!My Mom i more then just my Mom, she's my BEST FRIENDm too! I can talk my Mom about EVERYTHING & ANYTHING! When I was younger, when my 4 younger brothers would go to bed we would have a "Girls Night" on Saturday nights. We would watch "ER" and eat Ben & Jerry's Chocoalte Chip & Brownie Fudge ice cream together & talk about everything! My Mom and I were always very cloe ever since I could remember. She always pushed me to do my BEST! Even when I didn't believe in my-self My Mom believed in me. She alwyas taught me to reach for the stars and to believe in my-self because I can do ANYTHING I want as long as I put my heart to it and believed in my-self. My Mom has helped me so much with my self-confidence. Until I was in 8th grade I didn't have much self-confidence in my-self mostly becuase of the kids that were in my grade. My Mom taught me not to care what people think about me and as logn as I'm happy with my-self that's all that matters! My Mom is the strongest person I know! It's alwyas just been My Mom, my 4 younger brothers, and me. My Mom got divorced when I was much younger and had to take care of all 5 of us without any help especially after my Nanie & Popa passed away. Even though my Mom had to raise us all by her-self she's ALWAYS BEEN THERE FOR ALL OF US! SHE'S NEVER LET US DOWN! My Mom has been to all of my dance recitals, our soccer games, baseball games, softball games, basketball games, back-to-school nights (5 all on the same night), our school masses, school events, EVERYTHING IN OUR LIVES! MY MOM HASN'T MISSED ANY OF IT! My Mom's favorite time of the year is the Fall and the Holidays. she loves all the festivites. SHE ADORES APPLE & PUMPKIN PICKING! My Mom CAN'T WAIT until we go see te Christmas Show at Radio City Music Hall. She's the most enthusiastic the person ever, and even more during the holidays! In December of 2007 my Mom fell really badly! She shattered her knee cap in pieces! My Mom needed surgery withing a week! I had NEVER been this sacred in my life! The one person who had always been there for my brothers and me was really hurt! There was so much going on while this all happened, my borthers and I knew no matter what esle happened we had to be there for Our Mom. She was ALWAYS there for us, and we COULD NEVER let Her down! Within 2 months My Mom had 2 surgeries and it was a slow recovery, but everyweek was a milestone because She had 2 severe knee surgeries in such a short amount of time. I aspire to be just like my Mom EVERY DAY because I BELIEVE SHE'S THE BEST PERSON EVER! She's overcome so MANY obstacles and still puts everyone esle before herself, ALWAYS! I LOVE MY MOM! :)

Papa & Nanie

Why do things happen? I believe in the statement "Things happen for a reason" Well, what happens if soemthing horrible happened and you try looking for the "reason" behind it, but you couldn't find it? Things just kept getting worse!
When I was in the beginning of 6th grade my Papa was diagnosed with bone cancer, but in the 4th stage, therefore, they couldn't do anything for him. He suffered in severe pain for months. Then the dreaded day of November 27th,2001 came and he passed away 1 day after a month until his birthday. When my Papa passed away that was the first time anyone that close to me ever passed away. A year before my Papa died my Nanie had a massive stroke, the doctors didn't expect Her to make it through it. But of course, no surprise to me She made it through it. After my Papa died she continued to have seizures and mini-strokes, in 7th grade she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, there's no cure for it. As time went by we would go see my Nanie in the nursing home, an you could tell She wasn't getting better because she would talk about my Papa,who already passed away, that he came by this morning to visit. She also would alwyas confuse our names, too. My Nanie got very sick from Alzheimer's Disease she became more disoriented as time went on. On January 16th, 2005 my Nanie passed away from Alzheimier's Disease.

How do we know anything is what it is?

How do we know who we are?
Who says our name is what it is?
How do you know it's Thursday night?
Who says its 11:03?
Why are there only 24 hours in a day?
Only 7 days in a week?
How do we know anything is what it is?

Well Travis....

Travis seems to a "fan" whether or not he admits it, he knows he's a fan of my acrostic poems :)


Teases Jill about her acrostic poems

Raves about how "EASY" acrostic poems are to do

Assumes Jill even when you make fun of her :)

Victory over Travis :)

Isn't going to win this "EASY" acrostic feud! lol

Sterpendous poems of Jill :)

TODAY! :)

I has 2 classes today English & Math. After class I went ot my first Molloy Student Government meeting. It was really cool to see how the meetings are ran at Molloy compared to my high school. Then I went to the Community Service Committee Meeting, that was fun, too. It rained crazy today! I felt as if I was back in high school when we had to commute for classes and no one wanted to becaues it was pouring!

F-A-L-L acrostic poem

Fall is arriving
Apple picking is coming up
Leaves are starting to change colors
Leaves are falling over the trees

Sunday...

Nothing interesting happened today...did homeowork,first Sunday I didn't have to work, it felt werid not working...

"COLLEGE"-An Acrostic Poem

Creating new memories and going through new expeirences
Outgoing personality
Learning new topics and taking new courses
Listening to different people's ideas, advice, and topics
Earning a degree
Graduation has come and gone
Experiences that await us

"The Calm Before the Storm"

When there's a storm brewing everything is peaceful
You can hear everything outdoors moving and the animals lurking around
As you look up at the sky you can see the clouds moving faster and iamgine what you see
The sky has a differnt shade of blue then most days
THE CALM BEFORE THE STORM

WHO AM I?

"Who Am I?" is a common question especially around the ending of high school until the beginning of the college. The question is answered differently based on every person, the age of the person, and how the question is being asked.
When Dr. Russo, asked us to write a paragraph or 2 about "who am I?" on our blogs, I thought of the speech I had to write for Shepherds in my high school, which was titled, "Who Am I?". Over this past summer I thought a lot about how I changed, the people I was friends with, family, who I was as a freshmen going into college opposed to a high school senior.
Right now I know I'm very outgoing, personable, trustworthy, honest, talkative, and ??? I have 4 younger brothers and I', the oldest of 5. I'm a freshmen at Molloy College and LOVE it already! It reminds me of my high school, a very "homie" feeling. I've already started getting very invovled at Molloy. I'm president of the Literary Magazine, staff of the Molloy Forum & Molloy Yearbook, running for Freshmen Class President-MSG, going to join the Education Club, and apart of Campus Ministry. My major is education w/special ed in english. I'm trying to decide if I want to teach younger children or high school. I've always wanted to teach younger children, but since I graduated high school I've been reconsidering what grades I'd like to get my degree in. I have time to figure that out, though.

...Rain...

It's raining out! One of the best things to do tonight is relax and watch a movie. With the trees blowing and the buckets of rain, the Tropical Storm is dropping on us it feels as if it's the end of September opposed to the beginning of September. I think I'm going to watch Juno in a little bit, I've never seen that the movie before I heard it's really good. Tomorrow night at 10:00 Army Wives comes back! They didn't show any new episodes for a few weeks. The coming attractions look really good. I got to start thinking of a Halloween costume! Completely random thoughts :)

Sam is sitting next to me

I met my friend Sam on the Molloy Leadership Conference, we attended in July. She's now in all of my classes except 2. She's sitting right next to me. lol :) I know you're reading this Sam. :)

The Jonas Brothers Concert

On Sunday Augut 10th, I went to The Jonas Brothers Concert in New York City at Madison Sqaure Garden. I went with my best friend Andrea and our friend Michelle. We spent the day in the city. We went to the concert early and Demi Lovato performed as the opening act. Right before The Jonas Brothers came out and performed the MC came out and told us the concert we attended was going to be the performance they're using for the 3-D movie. The 3-D movie will be in theatres.

"On-Going Assessment"